Luking Goode reports.
"It's Time To Lose The Nails"
 |
| Freddy Krueger Demi-God/Goblin Semi Retired |
Freddie Krueger today announces that he is losing his nails for good. The 93 year old dreamscape monster, most noted for making eery chalkboard noises across metal surfaces and cutting and shredding people up to bits said he was sick & tired of plastic surgery and endless doctor bills that his medical insurance just would not cover. When asked what he plans on doing with his newly manicured hands Krueger says, "I always wanted be a hand model or maybe even a puppeteer. Now I can be all the normal things that all those other children dream about being.
Doctors say it shouldn't take long for Freddy to heal after the operation based on his previous recuperative powers. We'll keep you posted on Freddy's new nightmare as they become real.
UNIR1 Hypothetical News.
UNIR1 © 2012 All Rights Reserved.
No comments:
Post a Comment